Thursday, December 31, 2009

Gee I.. need some Joe

It's not that I didn't just LOVE the G.I. Joe movie more than life.. it's just that it was.. well.. horribly predictable. I admit I rented this more for my husband than myself. The only thing G.I. Joes are good for, IMO, is sitting on plastic horses. Hey... back in MY day the barbies weren't all bendy.

Pre-movie (me making dinner): Oh boy, I can't wait to see this movie. Cause you know it's all about the hot babe in skin tight armor (I might have said this in a slightly sarcastic tone)

Lem: what? who said there's a hot babe in this movie?

me: there's ALWAYS a hot babe.

*fast forward to movie time* *First 10 minutes of movie... crazy action sequence.. oh look, hot babe in skit-tight cleavage-revealing leather outfit*

me (to Lem): You can hear me saying it, can't you?

Lem: (small voice) yes.

And I'm sorry, but if the bad guy calls for the Sharks to be mobilized, then I expect to see FRICKIN SHARKS WITH FRICKIN LASER BEAMS ATTACHED TO THEIR FRICKIN HEADS.. but noooo, they just had to be some dumb little submarine machine thingies. Disappointing, I must tell you Internet.

The ninjas were cool, though. In fact, the only thing cooler than ninjas fighting, is ninjas fighting amongst lots of cool mad scientist-looking electricity beams. Thumbs up for that sequence.

Oh and that guy? That whistling guy? He's from The Mummy. Yeah it was bugging the crap out of us for half the movie til I figured it out. You're welcome.


Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Movie Review Week!

So last night I spent a little of my birthday money and bought an "unlimited week" pass from Blockbuster for $18. Sort of like Netflix -- I can rent 2 movies at a time, and have unlimited rentals for the entire week. Which basically means we're gonna be watching a lot of movies this week to get my $$'s worth!! I figured with the kids still off for winter break, I could cycle through movies and let them see some stuff I'm not interested in watching too.

Last night I rented "9" and the new Star Trek movie (the latter I had seen previously). "9" is a computer animated movie which revisits the tired theme of the earth after humanity destroys itself. Animation was decent, interesting concept.. A little predictable. Ok for kids. Overall not unhappy to have seen it but don't need to see it again. I do find it ironic that the man who did the voice work for the scientist (Alan Oppenheimer) is 3rd cousin to J. Robert Oppenheimer, who helped develop the first nuclear weapons.

The new Star Trek movie -- well I will unashamedly admit to being a diehard Trekkie so I was a little leery of this movie at first. I'm happy to say it was a very satisfying movie experience with lots of little Trekkie tidbits thrown in. You get to meet all the original ST cast when they are young, and see how their relationships developed. Some language, brief sensuality, but nothing that made me cringe or squirm overly with the kids watching it with us. Lots of funny parts, I laughed, I cried (yes, I really did), thumbs up. Oh, and young Spock is yummy. 'Nuff said.


Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Dialogue Last Night

Me: I'm making myself some popcorn

Daughter: make me some too!

Me: come make your own!

Daughter: I can't, I have to go to the bathroom!

Me: well make it when you get done!

Daughter: *stomps to bathroom* I'm VERY disgruntled!

Me: Do you even know what that means??

Daughter (from bathroom): No, but you say it all the time.

*roll eyes*

The Big Four-Oh

So today is my 40th Birthday. Woohoo! I must say for being such a milestone, I really don't feel any differently than I did yesterday. No, that's not entirely accurate.. now when I say my age, it feels OLD.

Anything starting with a "thirty-" gave me the illusion that I was "still in my thirties". In my opinion, the 30's were a pretty cool age period. I was old enough to finally figure out what I wanted to do as a career, I was mature enough to actually pursue that without wasting time, energy or money goofing off like I did in my 20's.

Now, I'm faced with thoughts like, "how soon til IT hits.." you know.. the big Scary M-word (that's menopause, for you folks following at home).. and "crap, all that weight I was going to lose in my 30's.. now I have to do it in my 40's, and it's even harder then -- ugh!". Oh and now I get to have annual mammograms, at least until the recent studies that show they should only need to be done every 5 years instead of every year become more widely accepted.

Gross, being a girl sucks sometimes.


Monday, December 28, 2009

Now I Lay Me Down To.. Zzzzzzzzz

So today my husband went to his Sleep Center consultation appointment, where the Doctor after listening to him describe his symptoms pretty much said, yep, you have sleep apnea, you win a prize -- a new car!!!

Ok.. he didn't really say that last part. So poor Lem gets to go back tonight and get jacked in, hooked up, inspected, detected, infected, neglected and selected.. and other fun stuff they don't even tell you about in the brochure. I can't imagine a more worse way to test someone's sleep pattern than to stick a bunch of wires all over their person (hey! don't put that THERE!) and then put them in an unfamiliar room behind one-way glass where they are probably making little hand puppets that are eating your head while you're trying to sleep, and tell them.. ok.. SLEEP! But.. don't roll over or move or you'll pull all the little wires out and we'll have to start alllllll over again. So.. just sleep like you normally do (or don't). Yeeeeeaaaaah.

Hopefully all of this will lead to a cool little machine that we will get to have next to our bed that pumps oxygen under his nose and makes it so he can actually breathe real air instead of the noxious fumes that are his nighttime gas that are the REAL reason that neither of us get any sleep at night. Where do I sign up for one of those machines???


Saturday, December 26, 2009

Holiday Fun

Well Merry Christmas to everyone! We had a fun filled Christmas Eve at the in-laws for the big family get-together.

Yummy Chinese takeout for all, gift exchange, and the fun gag-gift dice game. What's that? It's basically where everyone brings a white elephant gift, and then you all sit in a big circle and take turns rolling a pair of dice and try to get doubles. If you get doubles, you get to snag a present from the center and open it, or steal someone else's present they already opened. Something can only change hands 3 times until it's permanently "stolen" and retired. Lots of fun ensued, the most popular items that got stolen were a lovely scented candle set, a rather pretty blown glass rooster, and a nerf dart gun that yours truly had brought as a gift.

We have a family tradition from Lem's side that we open one gift Christmas Eve, and it's always PJ's and you have to wear em Christmas morning or you don't get to open gifts.

Christmas day up bright and early to open gifts with the kids. Money being really tight this year we decided to not get stuff for each other to make sure we could give the kids a good Christmas. Santa still filled our stockings with lots of yummy candies and little things, though :)

This is me Christmas morning in my new PJ glory (note the festive Santa socks):

About 8:45am, I start getting ready to put the ham in to cook for our early dinner later in the day. And then I realize that for some inexplicable reason, we don't have any flour in the house. I'm not sure how I've managed to not have flour in the house since we moved here but there you have it. I was using a cooking bag for the ham (it being rather large) to help cut down on the cooking time, and you have to add flour into it to help keep it from exploding in your oven (heeey, that sounds like something to send in to Mythbusters!!). So I hopped in the car (still in my Christmas PJ glory, and went and got flour at the store. Didn't even get any funny looks for my Smiley PJs.

Lem's side of the family came over later, my ham dinner was a success, and we had lots of fun opening gifts and getting our butts kicked by my daughter at Harry Potter Scene It, 2nd edition. She even got her Grandpa Smith to play Spongebob Connect 4 with her!!

I am now the proud owner of an iPod Touch, which is very exciting, and I now get to spend hours and hours fixing all my music files so they are actually organized, and properly labeled with album names etc. so that I can have those cool little album cover icons when I'm searching for music to play. Doh!


ps. yes.. that Hershey bar in the pic? We got that for our daughter.. it's 5 lbs. O.O

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Even the Food is Fat

We all know that studies show Americans are in general getting fatter every year as a populace. What we didn't realize is the REAL cause: the FOOD is getting fatter!

In my work breakroom they put out a big container of Animal Crackers. I love animal crackers.. I remember when I was a young girl getting the little PT Barnum animal crackers that came in the box that looked like a circus wagon with little animals pictured in it, with the little string you could carry it with. Oh the fun of playing Make Believe with the animals it contained until you gleefully bit their heads off. The animal crackers supplied here are in fact an off brand.

Exhibit A:

Ok what the hell is this??! Is this a mutant sheep??

Exhibit B:

Clearly an attempt at an elephant.. or an alien, I can't really tell.

Exhibit C:

Obviously some kind of large cat species.. apparently female and nursing??

Exhibit D:

Mooooo! Looks like Bessie's been hitting the hay too much.

I can just picture some farm somewhere, where all the little cookie animals are in tiny little pens or those head-restraint thingies and force fed day and night until they are outrageously overweight, and then they are taken out back behind the woodshed and shot and shipped out. Don't believe me? Look at the photos again.. SEE THE BULLET HOLES??!!!

Is there a PETCA?

Oh the humanity..


Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Chocoholics Are Forgiven Much

At the store earlier:

Me (to kids): Don't forget I'm cooking Fudge for Christmas


Me: Er.. thanks?

Apparently my Awesome factor is directly linked to the amount of fudge available. Less fudge = less awesome. o.o

Evening, Child Interruption

Child: *puts formerly lose tooth on my computer desk*

Me: Hey cool! Tooth came out finally!

Child: Yeah I ripped it out of the cat's face.

Lem: Well that's better than ripping it out of your brother's face.

Child: Dangit! I should have thought of that story instead.

Punctuation Fail

Well it seems that even though the state symbol here is NOT the orange barrel (unlike Ohio - ugh).. there's always a bit of roadwork going on somewhere. The street I drive on near my work has been doing construction, including something where they have a strip going across the road that is a plate of slightly raised metal, not really speed-bump quality but close. They put up a construction sign the first day:

I swear to God this was my thought process as I saw it:

"Motorcycles, use extreme caution... WTF?? *looks around construction site* I don't see any motorcycles? They're using motorcycles for their construction?? WHERE?!!

OH. It's telling motorcycles to use extreme caution. Duh."

I swear it's not my fault. I blame the Transportation Department for conditioning me to automatically insert a comma into road signs.. like "SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY" .. we all make fun of that one, but we really know it means "SLOW, CHILDREN AT PLAY" see??? Completely not my fault. Really.


Monday, December 21, 2009

Welcome to the Land of Crows

Well as my first official blog post, I thought I'd make something clear. I'm writing this for my own amusement, and perhaps the amusement of my friends and family. Anyone else that wants to read it, and is then amused, amazed or appalled.. hey, welcome!

So I drive a good 30 minutes to work every day. It's really about the same commute time that I had in Ohio, the difference here is that the freeway I'm driving on winds through gorgeous forested hills with a mountain backdrop. And, the crows. In Ohio, especially where I drove, I saw Herons almost every single day flying near the freeway. I assume they were off to go stand picturesquely in some corporate business's front pond where the busy freeway drivers would completely fail to notice their beauty and thusly have a crappy day instead of getting warm fuzzies. I always got warm fuzzies from them ("hey, there's MY heron! it's following me!!!")

Unlike those other drivers, I notice things. I attribute this to my parents, especially my mom who was a nature freak and felt the need to point out every type of tree, plant, leaf, insect and animal in any forest we ever visited. Now I wish I'd paid more attention.
It does, however, mean that I notice things as I drive that I think other drivers just miss. Here I see an occasional red-tailed hawk on a light post, a sea gull or two, and crows. LOTS of crows. So many crows, that I think they must be Washington's state bird. They are so big that I sometimes mistake them for hawks until I get close enough to distinguish their ruddy feathering and distinct beaks.

I realize this is probably geography-related. Perhaps western Washington has song birds? Here I think the crows have eaten them or something. There are no flocks of songbirds winging across the sky in impressive synchronized flying (how the hell do they NOT hit each other as they constantly shift directions?!). Instead you get the baleful stare of a crow from a lamp post, or a tree branch. Just not the same.

Just a shout out for anybody that wants to do yet another remake of the movie The Birds? Come to eastern Washington, these crows are freaky scary huge and just waiting to peck people's eyes out, I can feel it.